Read this online this morning. I was broken, crushed, disturbed. [here]
In some ways, it is appropriate to hear of his suicide. I could not envision him fading slowly away from disease or dementia.
May he have a safe journey in the Great Land Shark.
Looks like I know what I will be reading on my many hours on the plane Wednesday and Friday. I have many new HST books I bought months ago…never cracked them. Now I am compelled to re-visit the place where I discovered that the madness I felt when I was 17 was shared by others.
In the accutane fuelled psychosis, I found HST. I discovered that if I wrote down those thoughts, those ideas, those flashes of dangerous confusion, I could survive the meltdown of my brain chemistry.
Twenty years later, still recovering from the Accutane damage to my brain chemistry, I am actually impressed that he chose his own exit strategy. HST was always a master of the situation. He most likely reached the point in his life, made in the coldly rational, if inexplicable, madness of his mind, where it was time to bow and depart, rather than be carried of the stage.
I do not condone or condemn his exit. But I understand that he needed to go this way. For him, it was the final act. The final trip.
You will always live on. Those who do not understand you, what you meant to the rest of us, they have never had to look into their minds and see the bats, the lizards, and the monsters that live there. Hey faced those creatures and drank with them for 67 years. May I be so lucky as do be able to find that balance.
The gargoyles and bats of my mind raise a toast to you, Hunter.
Someone who sees his departure the same way I do. [here]